If your marriage is in trouble but you want to avoid divorce, you should know that you have many options.  There are resources and tools that can be used to put the broken pieces back together and create the marriage you both want in the future; whatever the issue or issues are.  For example, if there was infidelity, individual or joint coaching or marriage counseling can be very helpful.  Therefore, prior to doing anything, it might be helpful to identity the reasons and/or reasons for the problem/problem; this can help point you in the direction of the right help.

Other than infidelity, couples can also struggle with financial issues, which is a huge factor that can lead to divorce.  Spending/saving habits can be different, many couples overextend, meaning they live on borrowed money which can cause huge amounts of stress on a marriage. Of all financial factors, credit cards seem to be one the most common problems. Whether they are known about by both spouses or not.

When more money goes out than comes in, massive stress takes over, and this can lead to fights, resentment, distrust, etc.  Before long, it soon becomes too much to handle, and the relationship can break down.

If you find that you and your spouse are on the verge of divorce specific to problems with finances, for the sake of the marriage, it might be a good idea to go visit a finance advisor or credit counseling company to help get things back on track.

In addition to fixing the current problem and/or getting the current problem back on track, it is a good idea to come up with a plan for the future, so this scenario doesn’t happen again.   Marital Mediation can help.  It is a safe place where you and you spouse can sit down with me and create a contract together for the marriage you want in the future.

Just because a married couple is having financial problems, or any other issues, it does not mean divorce is imminent. In fact, using a mediator, coach, etc., can be a huge way to resolving the problem/problems and finding a solution.  One you both are happy with.  Then, create a solid plan for getting out of debt while also saving money. 

Most importantly, to avoid divorce, start communicating. Unless you talk, you can never work things out. Keep in mind that good communication does not mean yelling, it means talking as adults. Therefore, take time so the two of you can sit down face-to-face to discuss the current situation, regardless of the problem. If anger is too high, seek out professional help with a coach, or mediator.  Just remind yourself that it takes time to work things out but with dedication and determination, divorce can be avoided.

If you find yourself struggling in your marriage but do not want a divorce, call me, let me help you and your spouse create a marriage you can both be happy in.  (916)616-6191 or Lspiers19@yahoo.com