The social stigmas surrounding divorce are hard enough, but being a divorcee later on in life has its own set of challenges. According to a 2017 study conducted by the Pew Research Center, divorce rates for people in their 50s have doubled since 1990.

It is widely thought that divorcing at an older age may be easier because people have built a lifelong partnership and as a result, they will be more amicable. However, at the end of the day older divorcees are still susceptible to the pains of divorce that younger people experience.

Why Older People Divorce

There are many reasons why people choose to divorce later in life. It is natural as we age and progress in life to have different wants and needs from our partners that we may have had when we were younger.

Some common reasons people choose to divorce later in life are that they have grown apart in several ways. Some couples may have been thinking about divorce for a while but chose to stick it through until their kids became adults.

Some people have a mid-life crisis and realize that they want some new freedom and fear being stuck with someone at an older age. Others may want to start exploring things that their partners simply never cared for.

Whatever the reason may be, it is important to not feel ashamed about divorcing later in life and not let social stigmas dictate your decisions. 

Many people assume that you can’t find love again after a certain age. They end up assuming that they are “damaged goods” and that their love has an expiration date on it, but this is simply not true.

In modern times, people are getting back on to the dating scene as if they never left – even in older age. There are even dating apps and websites that specifically cater to those wanting a new love life during their midlife.

Tips for the Older Divorcee

Here are some tips to help you make this new transition:

Embrace the situation wholeheartedly. If you know that you are unhappy in your marriage and you want out, don’t let anyone make you feel guilty about your feelings. You are the only person who has to live with what you feel, and it is quite possible to live a happy life apart from your spouse – even after a long marriage.

This time in your life can feel very liberating. Think about it: your kids are gone and, most likely, out of your house; you’ve lived a long life and have probably had great experiences, and you have established yourself financially. You may simply be unhappy in your love life and want the freedom to do things you have always dreamt of doing.  If you have tried to make it work in your marriage, but you are still not happy, it is ok to make a change.  Life is short and everyone deserves to be happy.

Make sure that your retirement plan is not in jeopardy because of your divorce. Over the years, couples will expectedly have intertwined finances and assets that you will have to separate during the divorce.

Since divorcing at an older age means that you are closer to retirement, you don’t want to stress your finances if you can’t really afford to live alone. It is wise to revisit your retirement plan to make sure that you can still cover expenses such as healthcare and the possibility of long-term retirement.

Remember that moving on is the end goal. Whether you choose to get back into dating later in life after a divorce or you are confident that you want to be alone, make the best decision that aligns with your lifestyle and how you want to live.

If you are truly confident that you want a divorce at an older age, express this to your partner and work with them to create a plan for your divorce.

Are you going through a divorce at an older age? Would you like someone to help you navigate through this stage in your life? That’s what I am here for and I’d love to talk with you! Please feel free to schedule an appointment with me HERE!